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Thread: Expensive Escorts

  1. #41
    Gold Wiganer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rum dick View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Henry View Post
    I'm not saying Krypt's a made nigga - because really I'm not part of the decision team for that type of thing - but I will say he certainly carries himself like that of a made nigga.

    _________________________________________


    As for the topic at hand, I've shagged well over 50+ hookers. I started doing it when I was 18.

    I've definitely eaten some hooker pussy, not going to lie to you. I've even gone raw dog. A lot. I've fucked three at a time. I've fucked midgets. I've fucked women who were nine months pregnant. I've fucked blacks and whites, and Cubans and Mexicans and Europeans and a girl from every Asian country, literally. I've fucked Indians and grandmas and centerfolds and pornstars. I've made videos, slow motion high definition cumshot videos.

    These fellas, they don't understand our generation, Krypt.

    yeah we are gonna need the midget hooker trip report
    Just keep it short, OK?

     
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      rum dick: :rimshot
      
      ToasterOven: lol
    Quote Originally Posted by Tyde View Post
    I stay to myself and keep out of trouble and/or potentially problematic scenarios

  2. #42
    Diamond Mintjewlips's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wiganer View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by rum dick View Post


    yeah we are gonna need the midget hooker trip report
    Just keep it short, OK?
    I just hope its not a tall tale

  3. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mintjewlips View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Wiganer View Post

    Just keep it short, OK?
    I just hope its not a tall tale

    Henry will just tell another story that will Dwarf that one

  4. #44
    Plutonium big dick's Avatar
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    henry reminds me of the quiet buddy who never says shit but when he does it's always really funny

  5. #45
    Owner Dan Druff's Avatar
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    Never been to a hooker before (seriously), but I do know all about The Erotic Review.

    I first came upon it about 10 years ago, and found it to be incredibly entertaining. I loved to read the "Ripoff!" section for lulz.

    However, most of the good stuff (the "details") was hidden behind the pay area.

    I saw that you could get a free 30 day premium subscription if you submitted two reviews of your own.

    Wanting that access, but not wanting to negatively impact the site, I wrote some fake reviews which mimicked the existing reviews I had already read. So I would find a girl with overwhelming positive reviews and write a positive one, or I'd find one with overwhelming negative reviews and write another negative one.

    I did this for about 2 months in a row, before I got bored with it and stopped reading the site.

    However, I agree with DRK that a site like this is a must if you're going to do this stuff. Otherwise you risk getting either catfished or robbed.

  6. #46
    Diamond Mintjewlips's Avatar
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    I've never picked up a hooker but I've bought a lot of women dinner and never got so much as a hand job.......i should have bought a hooker.

    And where the fuck do you find a midget hooker??

    Please enlighten me Henry

  7. #47
    Owner Dan Druff's Avatar
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    Henry, can you explain the grandma thing?

    I can almost understand the desire to fuck a midget. But grandmas?

    Unless you're talking about 40-year-old grandmas who were from a trash family that reproduces every 20 years.

     
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      MumblesBadly: Grandmas can be as young as early 30s, Druff!

  8. #48
    Diamond DRK Star's Avatar
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    Druff,

    How can you read that post and NOT immediately give rep.

    You're a monster.

  9. #49
    Diamond DRK Star's Avatar
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    This thread may have to be renamed OFFICIAL HOF COPY PASTA THREAD

  10. #50
    Platinum Lord of the Fraud's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Henry View Post
    Druff, there was never any desire to fuck a grandma. There's no grandma thing.

    I've had hookers tell me they're a grandma, unprovoked, or tell me they have children older than I am. But I would guess the oldest woman I've paid to have sex with was still under sixty-five.

    I have had sex with a seventy-four year old when I was nineteen.








    This breaks all records I know of lol
    http://pnimg.net/w/articles-attachments/1/4c2/74d75c36d2.jpg

  11. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by Krypt View Post
    I just became a VIP member on TER, and i've got a couple of questions:

    1) Is it a bad idea to go down on these girls? I'm honestly not sure if these dudes that review chicks are just reckless perverts or what, but it seems that the top shelf girls with ratings 8+ are actually cool with 69, etc.

    2) Should I pay extra for anal?

    3) Is it kosher to make out with these girls and receive bbbj's from them, as it seems like that's what most of these guys are getting. I mean these girls are charging 500+ hourly; what are the chances of getting herpes (only std that im truly afraid, hiv is irrelevant because condom is obv)

    Discuss
    Herpes is a minor skin irritation that isn't progressive or debilitating. You're more afraid of that than HIV?

    Condoms drastically reduce the chance of HIV transmission but you want anal which has a much higher rate of condom failure and a much higher rate of transmission of all STDs. Better stay away from anal IMO. Any exchange of bodily fluids carries some risk of HIV transmission though kissing her and going down on her are very low risk.

    Can't help with the prostitution part, but there must be plenty of degens on this board who can.

  12. #52
    Diamond hongkonger's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 4Dragons View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Shizzmoney View Post
    I would assume the better looking the chick, the more likely she has the death because of the fact that more dudes from probably plowed through her like she was a highway full of snow.



    Or even worse, get you arrested. Cops here in Massachusetts run stings on there all the time (they even nabbed a high paying professor at Northeastern recently). There is also the danger of catfishing; one dude robbed 8 others posing as a woman online before he eventually got caught.
    Some of the hookers around here have been pulling knives on guys and holding it to their balls whilst they rob them blind... I mean like for years this has been de rigueur policy for some of these ho's.
    Legalize it and it will be a lot harder for them to get away with this shit.

     
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      MumblesBadly: :this
      
      4Dragons: i have no problem with legalization

  13. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mintjewlips View Post
    There's nothing better then someone who actually wants to blow you. I'd rather fuck a fat chick with linebacker shoulders then go on backpage and find some catfish who looks nothing like her picture..because its a sting...now it comes full circle...you wind up fucking your hand either way.....sooo just jerk off
    Couldn't agree more. I don't want to be with a woman who's with me because I'm paying her. Does nothing for me.

  14. #54
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    Quote Originally Posted by rum dick View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Henry View Post
    I'm not saying Krypt's a made nigga - because really I'm not part of the decision team for that type of thing - but I will say he certainly carries himself like that of a made nigga.

    _________________________________________


    As for the topic at hand, I've shagged well over 50+ hookers. I started doing it when I was 18.

    I've definitely eaten some hooker pussy, not going to lie to you. I've even gone raw dog. A lot. I've fucked three at a time. I've fucked midgets. I've fucked women who were nine months pregnant. I've fucked blacks and whites, and Cubans and Mexicans and Europeans and a girl from every Asian country, literally. I've fucked Indians and grandmas and centerfolds and pornstars. I've made videos, slow motion high definition cumshot videos.

    These fellas, they don't understand our generation, Krypt.

    yeah we are gonna need the midget hooker trip report
    And the grandma and the preggo

  15. #55
    100% Organic MumblesBadly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lord of the Fraud View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Henry View Post
    Druff, there was never any desire to fuck a grandma. There's no grandma thing.

    I've had hookers tell me they're a grandma, unprovoked, or tell me they have children older than I am. But I would guess the oldest woman I've paid to have sex with was still under sixty-five.

    I have had sex with a seventy-four year old when I was nineteen.









    This breaks all records I know of lol
    In my late teens, I probably would have hit someone like this if the opportunity had arisen.

    Name:  image.jpeg
Views: 546
Size:  35.8 KB

    No. Make that "... definitely..."

     
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      Mintjewlips: i would fuck a 75 year old Raquel Welch or however you spell her last name
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    I actually hope this [second impeachment] succeeds, because I want Trump put down politically like a sick, 14-year-old dog. ... I don't want him complicating the 2024 primary season. I just want him done.
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    Were Republicans cowardly or unethical not to go along with [convicting Trump in the second impeachment Senate trial]? No. The smart move was to reject it.

  16. #56
    Platinum Lord of the Fraud's Avatar
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    Banged some absolute creatures in my time Mumbles. But a 74yo dragon from POF is beyond even my dirty dick.

    But I don't judge. Horny Henry needed his sack drained and wasn't afraid to lube up his skin & bones catch to get the job done.


    Now, more trip reports please Henry.
    http://pnimg.net/w/articles-attachments/1/4c2/74d75c36d2.jpg

  17. #57
    Owner Dan Druff's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Henry View Post
    Druff, there was never any desire to fuck a grandma. There's no grandma thing.

    I've had hookers tell me they're a grandma, unprovoked, or tell me they have children older than I am. But I would guess the oldest woman I've paid to have sex with was still under sixty-five.

    I have had sex with a seventy-four year old when I was nineteen. I met her on pof. She had a profile that was essentially an open invitation. I drove two hours both ways to visit her before cumming inside her multiple times. She took me to a breakfast diner at one point in the middle. It was disgusting. I mean the overall experience that is, the chocolate chip pancakes were good enough.

     
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      Starbucks Spunk Bucket: yes!

  18. #58
    Owner Dan Druff's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Henry View Post
    Druff, there was never any desire to fuck a grandma. There's no grandma thing.

    I've had hookers tell me they're a grandma, unprovoked, or tell me they have children older than I am. But I would guess the oldest woman I've paid to have sex with was still under sixty-five.

    I have had sex with a seventy-four year old when I was nineteen. I met her on pof. She had a profile that was essentially an open invitation. I drove two hours both ways to visit her before cumming inside her multiple times. She took me to a breakfast diner at one point in the middle. It was disgusting. I mean the overall experience that is, the chocolate chip pancakes were good enough.
    Was about to criticize the cumming inside her thing, but then I realized you couldn't get her pregnant even if it was 25 years ago.

     
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      Mintjewlips: (laugh track)

  19. #59
    Plutonium big dick's Avatar
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    HORNY HENRY IS GOD

  20. #60
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    Quote Originally Posted by Henry View Post
    Druff, there was never any desire to fuck a grandma. There's no grandma thing.

    I've had hookers tell me they're a grandma, unprovoked, or tell me they have children older than I am. But I would guess the oldest woman I've paid to have sex with was still under sixty-five.

    I have had sex with a seventy-four year old when I was nineteen. I met her on pof. She had a profile that was essentially an open invitation. I drove two hours both ways to visit her before cumming inside her multiple times. She took me to a breakfast diner at one point in the middle. It was disgusting. I mean the overall experience that is, the chocolate chip pancakes were good enough.

    I pretty much have the same problem, I have proven time and time again that I will pretty much stick my dick in anything.

     
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      big dick: hammering hank rep

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